Thursday, March 12, 2015

Marriage on and off the rocks


     In marriage, we are all geologists. We always know which stones are the heaviest, which are the ones which will shatter the most upon contact, break into a million tiny precedented bitternesses. We stand behind our fortresses, hurling with all our might and wonder at the destruction. Our partner in life and this slow war of attrition, hides down behind their bunker and we throw harder. Or, they come up standing, risking blow after blow to throw their own stones, the ones they know will hurt the most, have the longest history of damage done.

     But what if we could put down those stones? What if, when we empty our pockets and the deepest recesses of our lesser selves, we unburden not only our partner, but lighten our own load. What if we come out from behind our cairns and meet in the middle, leaving behind our past and step toward the future with empty pockets, hearts clean of scar tissue.
    The person on the other side of that bunker is your own personal geologist because they have seen the depths of you; they know the fires in which you were forged, the stuff of which you are made. And they’re still there, standing on the strata of previous battles. They’re still there. And what a beautiful thing to walk away from the carnage, hand in hand and pockets turned inside out with nothing left but hope.

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